My Grandma
24 Jun 2010 Leave a Comment
My Grandma went to be with God on June 10. My husband and mother-in-law blessed me by taking me to see her a few days before.
I miss her. She wrote and painted like I do. I told her I got my talent from her. I would like to share more about my grandma, but she was a very private person. I’m respecting that, but I just had to say that I miss her and always will.
Feeling Happy
10 Apr 2010 Leave a Comment
You know, I feel happy and content! Wow! Here is an exercise I did that really did help:
I am in a support group, and it was suggested to draw or find pictures that make us feel happy. The idea is to dwell on those things instead of the negative stuff that many of us gravitate toward. These drawings or pictures could be things, memories, activities, people, goals, anything that make you feel happy.
Some things I drew were:
Jay’s arms–They are the best place to be.
Peanutbutter
My Wedding
My Baptism– The day I publically proclaimed Jesus.
My brothers– I used to blackmail them into playing “Baby and Mommy” with me! Fun times!
Pete– My 3rd grade crush
Ocean
Roaster Coasters
Disney’s World– I want to go there!
I had at least 50 drawings!
Try it! Overwhelm yourself with the good in your life! And by the way, there is no where in the Bible that says we can’t feel good–just as long we don’t get big heads!
The Celebration of Easter
03 Apr 2010 Leave a Comment
Tomorrow is Easter. It’s a joyous celebration of the resurrection of Jesus. The resurrection shows Jesus is trustworthy. He said He would conquer death, and He did! Knowing that Jesus is trustworthy is important. It’s means we can believe Him. He said He came to save. He said He and the Father is one. He said eternal life is found through Him. He said God loves us. Jesus said He would not forsake us. He said he wanted to give us an abundant life. He said He had rest for the weary. He said we would have much trouble in this life, but we should take heart for He has overcome the world. He said He would be back! We can believe Jesus because He did what He said he would do on that Sunday morning.
The days leading to Easter is a special time too because we are reminded of a remarkabole truth: God understands and can relate to human suffering. Jesus felt totally alone in the garden. He felt the pain of betrayal of Judas. He felt the sting of abdonment of friends. Then, there was the physical pain He experienced. When we are suffering we can know that we have a God who “gets it” because He went through it. That gives me such comfort and all the more reason to celebrate Easter.
Progress on my Novel
03 Apr 2010 Leave a Comment
I went to the coffee shop near the local university to work on my novel yesterday.. After 3 hours of writing, I deleted more than half of what I wrote. I just didn’t like it. The words just didn’t ring true. If you are any kind of an asrti st, you know what I mean.\More than anything, I want my characters to be believable. I want to write a novel to be thought provoking, not superficial and contrite..
Even though I didn’t get much done, the act of writing thrilled me. It seem my voice has been lost for quite awhile but is now returning. The grant was just what I needed to get my juices flowing!
Blog Frustrations
30 Mar 2010 Leave a Comment
I want to write so much here, yet I know I can’t get too personal. I want to honor those who are in my life. I mean, for example, if my husband happens to hurt my feelings, it would be wrong to write it all out here. That is why I still keep an old fashion journal. I can still get the feelings out, feel better, learn from it, and honor people by keeping it private.
But my question is this, are blogs inherently shallow because most people draw pretty strict boundaries on what they will or will not write about?
I think that is one aspect of heaven that I am looking forward to. We will be no need to hide any part of ourselves. Our sin nature will be totally dead. We will be in the light and true intimacy will begin.
Any thoughts?
Healing
24 Mar 2010 Leave a Comment
Last Saturday night, my husband and I went to a healing room. This is place where you go for healing from Jesus. It was beautiful. There were candles and soothing worship music in the background. We truly felt the presence of God.
After praying for awhile, two prayer warriors came to pray with us. They were people who truly love the Lord and people.
I asked for emotional healing and for healing for my vision. I know God heard me, and He will heal me. What will that look like? I have no idea. I just know He will do whatever He knows is best.
Heidi, one of the people who prayed with us, said, God wants me to know that He loves me. I must admit, I was a bit disappointment. I mean, I know, God loves me. Then again, do I really? The more I wonder about this, the more I wonder if I understand the Depth of His love for me.
When I ponder the love that Jay has for me, I feel giddy with happiness. I feel beautiful and secure. I don’t think I feel that way when I ponder the love that Jesus has for me.
Solution: I need to explore the depth of His Love.
Libby
22 Mar 2010 Leave a Comment
Wonderful news! Jay and I are going to try to keep a cat again! I’m so very happy since I have had a void in my life ever since we gave Abbie last May.
Abbie was my orange kitty for 8 years. After we got married, Jay and I began to realize he was allergy to Abbie. Jay’s throat kept on swelling up. After ten months of trying different things, we were left to the last resort- putting Abbie up for adoption through the local animal shelter. It broke my heart. And even though my baby found a good home after 3 days, it didn’t really make it any easier.
Abbie is a cat, but in a strange way, she was my best friend. She was there through all my joys and through all my letdowns. Losing her was hard, but I took comfort knowing God would use Abbie as a blessing for someone else.
Jay has found other things that he was allergic to, so he thought we should try living with a cat again. I love him for wanting to fill the void. That is why we are going to keep the cutest fur ball named Libby for two weeks. We want to see if Jay is truly allergic to cats.
Libby is multi-colored with orange eyes. She is the most loving and behaved cat ever. She is around a year old, but we don’t have an exact birthday. Therefore, I’m declaring today–March 21st– as Libby’s birthday.
I’m so happy, and I pray that we can keep her!
Update: There is no question about it. Jay is allergic to cats. Therefore, we gave Libby to our very good friends.
I love my husband for trying!
My First Post
17 Mar 2010 Leave a Comment
I’m starting a blog. Yay!
Yesterday, I found out that I won a grant from the Indiana Arts commission to help me write a novel.. I’m excited but nervous. What if I can’t do it?
The grant panel recorded its session as it reviewed the grant applicants. They liked my passion for the project, but they did feel my writing samples were a bit weak.
That really hurt my feelings, but I must remember to not take criticism so personally. Besides, they wouldn’t have awarded me the grant if they didn’t believe in the project.
The main reason I applied for this grant was to put time restrictions on me. I have wanted to write this novel for at least four years. Now, I must have it done in a year!
My novel explores the journey of a woman with cerebral palsy to self-acceptance and love.
